The Death of a Spiritual Quest

The Death of a Spiritual Quest

When the heart wakes up in darkness
In the middle of the night
And you bear upon yourself
A burden of a fear
Something does not feel completely right
Something does not resonate like before
Some wise ones said long ago
The birth of man is the birth of his sorrow
but I say unto you
The birth of man's sorrow is only man's foolishness
For wisdom is plentiful and abundance is the nature of Life
Yet man is only full of misery in his Heart
Looking at the profits that come and depart
How foolish is such a man's mind
Leaves him to live like a total blind
The eyes that can see are unused to see
Ears that can here are deafened to hear
The tongue tastes nothing but dead broth
Skin just left to rot
Nose just smells the putrid smells
Oh what a life this is full of misery, death and cursed spells
Such a One numbed in his existence
Lives and yet not lives
For he is dead to his spirit
and to the Life of bountiful existence
Oh is this cursed dream or the mundane way of life?
The death of Spiritual Quest at bay with no strife?
Tell me my friend, for I do not know
I know just this,
when the wind moves it makes me flow
when the flowers bloom they make me glow
and as I look up at the skies it give me hope
for now  i look up again
for the mortal are too dead in their brains
Caught up in their mundane existence
Too blinded to see the sunlight glowing through darkness.

The Awakening of Being - Know Thyself – A myth or Reality.

‘Be a Light unto yourself

Like the fire in the darkest night

Wake up every moment and

Don’t go back to sleep.’

This great teaching was uttered by the Awakened One, who we know as ‘The Buddha’. I guess it is self explanatory for some, but for others? What does this mean – ‘Wake up every moment and don’t go back to sleep.’ It does not ring a bell, does it?

I am reminded of a small anecdote, I read few years ago.

A small fish asks a big fish “Where is the Ocean?” and the big fish answers “You are in it.”

“Where is our Spiritual Nature?””We are in it.” Some may even ask “what is this supposed to mean?””We are in it.”

It simply means to open your eyes and look and stay awake; you are never really away from your Self.

Understanding ones Spiritual Nature is not as difficult as it seems. We tend to think, if we seek a spiritual way of life then it is another kind of path to follow, but the Truth is, it is not. It starts from right Here right Now, Here and Now wherever we are Here and Now in this moment itself.

Why does this seem so alien for us to recognize our true intrinsic nature?

Spirituality is not about seeking something, far away in the mountains and caves of Himalayas rather about knowing oneself in Here and Now. And that is what this is all about, knowing One Self as we are.

The Sun wanted to see what a night looks like, but never could find it somehow, whenever It decided to show up, the night vanished away. This is the nature of Awakening, of Godliness.

A seeker seeks God or a Spiritual way of life. Is God not there even before the seeking, during seeking, or after seeking? Why is it so important to seek and then to have found? A drama unfolds only for the sake of its enjoyer – the seeker and who is this enjoyer? Who is this seeker? This is the ultimate question that no one asks, because no one has really found an answer to that. There is no answer to this question. It is like looking for something that you don’t really know what it is you are looking for.

That deepens the mystery for a seeker so he seeks even further in the abysses of his life or Existence to enjoy the entire process of seeking itself. This seeking has to continue intensely until the seeker and the seeking become One and there is nothing really there to be sought. In such a Moment this seeking seeker simply vanishes into thin air? The seeking vanishes too. Where did this seeker go? He simply became nonexistent. What happened? No one really knows. The seeking consumed the seeker totally and hence got self consumed too. This is the moment of awakening. The awakening of a (no seeker) way of Being, the awakening of a nonexistent Identity, it signifies the moment of truth and awareness.

Unfortunately this is not true for many of us, we read about this, hear about it but we don’t experience this as being true for us. Why is that so? Why can’t we enjoy ‘A no way’, way of being? Why can’t we experience the simplicity of our true Being? How can it be possible to know this, in today’s times? Especially when we are living under such a high pressure cooking society? Knowing oneself - A myth or reality?

It is true we live in such a fast paced society today, it becomes very difficult to slow down and look at what is really happening in our minds. The thoughts are just pre occupied with one thing after another, there is no time to contemplate or reflect, and this is the curse of techno lifestyles. How can anyone without the intention to ‘look within’, really come to realize their own Self?

Intention to enquire equals self interrogation, self enquiry can only begin if one keeps a sincere intention to know oneself. This cannot be known by reading books or hearing audios or watching videos. It only starts when we ‘look within’ our own self and enquire the truth of our existence.

Knowing oneself has nothing to do with this entire social pressure network. It is simply about looking at the source of our intelligence, the source of our thoughts and the source of our existence. The simplest way to self enquire is to ask oneself ‘Who am I?’, ‘Where does this breath arise from?’, ‘Where are these thoughts arising from?’ ’Who is thinking? breathing, sleeping, dreaming or eating?’ ’Who is the doer here?’ A network of such questions should trouble ones heart, mind and soul, then only we can say self enquiry has begun. A True Guru ( Satguru) is the inspector of such self interrogation. He inspires such aspiration within a seeker’s heart. The Sat Guru is constantly lighting the fire for an internal revolution of consciousness, burning the conditioned mind down to ashes.

Without an intense insomnia caused by such questions, awareness does not really ignite the fire of Awakening within us. It has to trouble us, cause despair, sometimes even sorrow, that is good too, as the old saying goes, ‘No pain, no gain’. A compromised seeker is not a seeker of truth at all.

Knowing oneself integrates self understanding and hence brings a clearer perspective onto how we look upon ourselves. Self Understanding invokes Love. Sometimes Love in a Universal sense, or cosmic sense and sometimes love as we understand in more mundane worldly sense.

Speaking of it mundanely, we love the world and expect it to love back. But Self Loving is normally misunderstood, in the superficial sense at least it is understood as loving what one desires. This is neither, true Self Understanding nor true Self love.

True Understanding of Self inspires unconditioned love for all. It invokes compassion and kindness naturally without any effort of doing so, simply because no one and nothing is seen as being separate from One’s Self. This is the beginning of Self Knowledge. It is the beginning of knowing one’s Self and All as One.

The Ocean Self embraces all the waves of its existence. These waves that arise and flow then fall. It does not discriminate between the arising and dissolution of waves that dance on it. Though the waves appear separate yet they all are One only. Everything in Life too, is contained as Inseparable One Oceanic Existence only. This is true for all. No one and nothing is separate and there is no another, other than what is already One.

In conclusion, I would like to quote from the sacred verses of the Vedas. The essence of the Vedas and Upanishads also Glorify this Universal Truth of All is One. One such recitation so commonly heard during the chanting of the Vedas and Upanishads is as below:

Om Purnamidah Purnamidam Purnatya Purnamudachyate

Purnasya Purnamadaya Purnamevavashishyate.

Om Shanti Shanti Shanti

That is One. This is One. From One arises One.

Into One dissolves One. Thus remaining as One only

All is Still. All is Peace. All is One.

May all beings be Happy, May all beings be in Peace

Of the Past, Present and Future. Who am I?

Some one once asked me a strange question, "Who was I  in my past?"
What could I say? " Who you are now?" or " Who you will be in the future?"
The real question was actually "Who am I?", past, present and future didn't really matter
If I was able find out " Who am I?" that would have been sufficient to end this query
Yet the mind what boggled, confused and unable to clearly take this query to heart.
Then it struck, I could never really tell him who he was because he was asking the wrong person.
The person to ask this question to is the person who is asking this question.
Ask yourself I said, there was a quizzical look on the face and no response
Meanwhile within the deeper recesses of my mind I was watching quietly and observing deeply
What a simple question like " Who am I? " does to us
It brings out interesting reactions, memories and thoughts.
But the question still remains "Who am I?"
The questioner questioning his own self "Who am I?"
Now that is the most amazing thing that is happening.
A moment of total self enquiry, a moment of self introspection.
A perfect moment where the answer is pure Silence and nothing is left behind...
No question, no questioner and no answer
What is this then? Who can describe?
The tongue itself has become motionless then what can one really speak?
Just Be ... who so ever you are doesn't matter!
Just Be as you are ....:)  Just Be Still... Here and Now in This.

The Poverty of Human Beingness

I am just a wanderer among souls.
The eyes meet the eyes, and souls greet each other
Sometimes a Joy, sometimes pain,
Unspoken words don't need much to explain.
For I have seen so many rich in substantial kind
But they too are so poor within,
A matter of contrast and paradoxical joke
The richest are the poorest within.
Here I don't speak about richness in matter
Very few are rich in their soul
Most live a poor Human Life within
Deprived of any food for their Soul
I met a girl once, who would just cry all the time
So I asked her, "What is the matter?"
It was not a matter of matter any more
It was a matter of the Soul
How poor we are unloving ourselves
Unloving the very essence of Life
The very source of our Existence.
For Human Mind cannot comprehend the language of the Sprit
Of Essential wisdom and wit
God exists within, God without
Where is there where He is not around
So how can we belittle ourselves with petty thought
Of " I am not good enough and not worthy " so on so forth
We deny our Truth - His existence within
With Lies told to us from the beginning
"Love not yourself but the world" - A Teaching of the world
Cry and suffer until your existence is dearth
What a way to live has been taught
Poverty of Human kind unsought
For we shall forever cry in this way
This Life and even the next
Until the moment has come for us to Realize
The Real nature of this worldly Lies
That Glorious day we wake up to a simple Truth
Man within is God in all Divinehood
Such is the Glory our of Life and our Truth
Even if we live Blind eyed forever uncouth
Love your Self Love your Self my friend
For Unloving is nothing but a Living that is dead end. 

Surrender happening somehow

It makes me smile whenever i am in wonder
A total state of absolute surrender
I see the river flowing so soothing and calm
Leaving its destiny to earth's mould and the farms
Knowing not if it will reach the sea or desert
Somehow it is still a surrender
Love is just a river that flows
From the peak of Himalays where the sun brightly glows
As Shiva sits on the mount Kailasha
Ganga sweeps the valleys and hills blessing all with 'asha'
What is there to think about then and wonder
Be the Ganga, Be just like her, Surrender
You are Shiva, You are That
You are Ganga, You are That
You are the One to whom you wish to Surrender
Be That and remain in One Wonder
For who has to surrender to whom?
A God out there is not a God at all
A foolish oddessy then a turn back
A mind that wishes to know its true Essence
Like water knows its River Self
Throw yourself into the waters of Eternal Self
Surrender happens on its own in place of Egoic thunder
You are the River and you are such
A Love that grips from deep within drowing you is Surrender.

The Wise choose or not?

The vice of Choices, o fathom not dear friend.
A world so full of misery wallowing in darkness felt
One choice and then another an endless tale
Never exerting a moment's rest to such tales of pace
Consider this, Now for a moment though dear friend
Are the choices really ours, or we are already from the choices beforehand?
For what you choose today is already because of what was chosen previously
Though it appear to be your choice right now, it was destiny's preplay secretly
Now a moment of choice has come again untold
For you to see if That chooses for you or you are the choicer of predestined fold
A mysterious play is happening even Now
As we assert our choices are right somehow
You and me are all just tiny specks
Of the Almighty dust that covers the Cosmic events.

Showers of Grace

A million droplets within a cloud
Gripped by gravity of a fall
They fall on the barren earth
And Splatter on the mud
A spray of dust spreads around
Carrying a fragrance off the ground
Fresh Showers feel so warm
A welcome for the Heart
Remember the earth to blossom again
To bring the fragrance of flowers
A rain of Freshness - A Grace of showers
Happiness unfolds
Taking Hearts back Home
Such a Gracious event
Bringing Joy till no end
Dancing like a child
In these Showers of Grace
A child reborn
Just Playing in this Rain.

Hints of Life

An unknowing incident kept occuring long ago
Unknowing it might sound but yet not unknowing at all
Here and there everywhere loud and clear signs
Of events to unfold in a moment and trice.
Not just once but again and again
Indications coming from the mystical friend
Oh I never knew these could be so true
Hints of Life! Like wise old Oracles hoot.
I yet did not trust is so much as yet
And thought my mind was at play and game
But when the moment arrived in its fullest
I regret not paying attention to predicted bullets
Oh never again, I thought would i ever ignore
These Hints of Life
My Saviour Himself Foretold
For a friend somewhere is this little poem
A Hint of Life for a heart at home again....:)

Being Cooked at last in the pot

Expectations cooking everywhere
So does the desire to impress upon
When Expectations are under cooked
The Steam of anger releases
The whistle booms loud and clear
Unknown messages suddenly become clear
The heart wants to run afar
Looking for a place to hide underground
But Alas no such place ever exists
Finally to face the most wrathful mother in law form
What an irony for millions
Kali takes her sword and chops of the head
Finally no more an "I" left to be uttered
The simple one seeks refuge again in the kitchen
Under the glittering fire of the stove
Nursing hopes
That someday a change might suddenly awaken
And impress upon all a great Happiness.
Dedicated to a dear friend.....

WELCOMING A CHANGE

Ever heard of a story of a child asking for the moon? The child became so desirous for the moon that he would not want anything else other than the moon. The mother then took a shining plate and filled it up with water and kept it out so that the moon's reflection fell on the plate and called the child out to hold it. So this is how the child found the moon in his hands.

This world of excessive needs and wants never really ends. Desires never really end. What ends is, this body that takes birth and experiences death. The metamorphosis of the body from infancy to old age. We have seen it all happening over and over again, yet somehow these lessons of physical decay and change do not register in our hearts and in our minds. We procrastinate what is most essential to our being - the reality of our existence, the truth's about our lives. Human Being is no more Human and no more Being, perhaps it time to realize the beingness of being Human - adapting, accomodating and living with human values. Change is the need of the day, a change in how we think, how we live, how we are with ourselves, this planet, this life. The time has come for man who has been journeying through times has become man no more, he has fallen from the heavenly skies onto the mortal plains of this earth and has still fallen deeper into the dark pits of darkness and evil bearing shadows. Now we walk a different path searching the reversal of our consciousness.

From darkness to Light.

From Evil into the Divine Might.

We tread a long path, until we arrive Home

Into the Heart of our Being with Love

We return again as dust fragmented across the sands of Time

or as One wind that carries a storm within

whatsoever it maybe

our destiny to return Home never changes

what changes is the passing away

of this ephemeral world

of ceaseless activity and uncare

that only keeps on assuming different forms

masking our consciousness

Oh Man! Wake Up Wake Up

Before it is too late

To realise that another Lifetime has passed away

The Dawn has arrived Wake Up to the Rising Change.